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Funny Quotes

Most Famous Funny Quotes of All Time!

We have created a collection of some of the best funny quotes so you can read and share anytime with your friends and family. Share our Top 10 Funny Quotes on Facebook, Twitter, and Pinterest.

I distrust camels, and anyone else who can go a week without a drink.

Quotes by Joe E. Lewis

The way taxes are, you might as well marry for love.

Quotes by Joe E. Lewis

I haven't watched 'Mad TV' a lot, but I have seen some stuff on there that is truly funny. You have to have some sort of attitude toward the subject, and they seem to have it. It depends on how...

Quotes by Joe Flaherty

It's been a funny life for me. Sometimes I feel I haven't done a lot of living.

Quotes by Joanna Cassidy

I knew I was an unwanted baby when I saw that my bath toys were a toaster and a radio.

Quotes by Joan Rivers

Never floss with a stranger.

Quotes by Joan Rivers

I hope they make a show like M*A*S*H, which dealt with a lot of difficult subject matter but was very funny.

Quotes by Joan Severance

I was the troublemaker, always being funny - that's just who I am.

Quotes by Joan Smalls

Who do I like? I am a big fan of French and Saunders - not that that they are particularly stand-up I have to say, but I think they have been great for women and they are of themselves just...

Quotes by Jo Brand

The thing I thought about doing it was it's Comic Relief and you've got to be funny. So although I did try to sing properly it obviously has hilarious results when you can't sing.

Quotes by Jo Brand

I made a supreme effort not to do that thing that parents do, which is to bore people without children to death by going on and on about how funny their children are, so there's none of that hopefully.

Quotes by Jo Brand

I love storytellers. When I was growing up, my inspirations were watching Eddie Murphy, Dennis Wolfberg, and Louie Anderson. These guys were great at telling stories, and I made that my own style, talking about things that happened to me...

Quotes by Jo Koy

Comedy is just an unspoken language. Everybody understands it. Funny is funny. When it's not funny, they'll let you know.

Quotes by Jo Koy

If you just stop and think, baby, honey, love is a funny thing. Whatever you put in, that's what you expect to gain.

Quotes by Jimmy Reed

I gave my heart to the Lord, and I remember the incident vividly. The Lord spoke to me. I know that sounds funny. It was not an audible voice or anything of that nature.

Quotes by Jimmy Swaggart

It's funny how all of this has worked out - I wasn't popular in high school, but now every drunken guy in the United States wants to be my pal. They all want to buy me a shot, and pretty...

Quotes by Jimmy Kimmel

That's my main flaw: I always think authority figures or my boss is going to think something I do is funny. And usually they don't.

Quotes by Jimmy Kimmel

But my comedy hero was Stephen Chow. His deadpan comedy, all the stuff he wrote like 'From Beijing with Love,' it's incredibly funny.

Quotes by Jimmy O. Yang

I don't think it's any coincidence that I lost my religious faith and 'manned up' in the same year. I was described somewhere as a lapsed Catholic, which is funny because I'm not going back! I want to achieve things...

Quotes by Jimmy Carr

I didn't plan to be the rude middle-class comedian. You write a certain type of joke that you find funny, and mine happen to be often rude. Yes, it's juvenile, but that's me.

Quotes by Jimmy Carr

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