Funny Quotes
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It's a funny thing, the less people have to live for, the less nerve they have to risk losing nothing.
I really like funny women. I'm drawn to women like Tina Fey and Amy Poehler and Kristen Wiig, Amy Schumer. They're writers, they're producers, they're actresses. They're brilliant, funny, excellent women.
Whenever I'm in the U.K., people say I have an American accent. Which is, obviously, funny.
You know, I've just always been sort of goofy and kind of gone with it. I actually usually work more in drama, but I have been floating back and forth with comedy, and somehow they keep giving me jobs in comedy, so I guess there's something funny about me.
Over the years, I learned that in my career, unlike in life, sometimes my wheelchair is its own automatic door opener. I was able to win the OWN competition by applying one simple principle: be funny, and admit you suck before anyone else can call you out on it. In other words, make the narrative of your failure a comedy.
We all know how funny Morrissey is. Actually, you know what? I say that sarcastically. His songs are some of the funniest songs I've ever heard in my life. I mean, really. I mean, not that the 'Girlfriend in a Coma' is, like, really funny.
I think God has a sense of humor, and the way my lessons come from God is very funny. I have to laugh at myself even if it's a tough lesson.
It's great if you're funny or if you can dance, but if you are kind and decent, it comes out your pores.
It's funny, because I've never thought of myself as a Hispanic actor, like in 'American Gangster,' I'm playing an Italian. I've always been fortunate enough to have been allowed to play all these diverse roles.
With rap, it's a funny thing. You can say things, and people can take 'em the way they wanna take 'em.
Scenes change all the time. Scenes will change while you're shooting them, and you just have to roll with it 'cause that's what makes it funny. It's not being stuck in your character and how you're gonna do something, but to react to other people and to really have a real-life conversation.
'Vicky Donor' proved that the audience was waiting for well-scripted funny films.
I was this non-threatening funny guy who contrasted the image of the Brezhnevs and the Reagans of the world.
Earl Hebner used to call me 'Tiger,' so I went with the last name Woods because I thought it was funny. I'm a huge fan of X-Men and, just, intelligence in general, and the leader in charge is named Prof. Charles Xavier. I took Xavier from him and put together the two names.
It's funny how the smallest things I've done speak the loudest about me, but I like that.
We have a funny sort of love/hate relationship with critics because, unfortunately, in the art/commerce dance that we do, they drive people to the restaurant. Regardless of sometimes how well we prepare the food, if people don't know that we're out there, if someone isn't talking about us, you guys aren't coming.
It's a funny thing, but it's often overlooked that I'm a huge devout lover of French cooking. I have the utmost respect for them, though they have lost their respect for me because they think the way I cook is nutty.
I don't believe in the after life, although I am bringing a change of underwear.
The discovery I made was that, really, in America, if you went to high school in our country, it doesn't really matter where you went to high school. In a funny way, all high schools are the same.
I may be drunk, Miss, but in the morning I will be sober and you will still be ugly.
Funny songs aren't usually that good. Like Weird Al and maybe a couple of Beatles songs, but it's kind of hard to bring humor into rock music in an interesting way.
I thought it was really funny that half the people I autographed things for said, 'Autograph the back of my phone.' I was like, 'What? Really? Seriously?' They didn't have anything else.
TV deals in very broad strokes. Like, 'Oh, that's my dumb friend', or, 'That's my funny friend.' A true best friend, a sidekick, has to be a little deeper then that. You have to feel like there's nothing either character won't do. That someone really, really has their back.
I try to write stories that are thrilling and full of mystery and funny all at the same time, stories that raise moral questions but come up with very few moral answers, stories that emotionally touch readers through the characters.
I like dark humor. I think the world is very funny and tragic, and my photographs are basically dark Jewish humor.
With its missed lines and falling tombstones, 'Dark Shadows' was sometimes inadvertently funny, but what made the show work was the fact that the actors and the writers took it all very seriously.
I'm not funny ha-ha, but I look for real humour in just about everything I've ever played.
Somebody once said that my look was like if Aileen Wuornos got acquitted and got a book deal. And I was like, 'That's wrong, but it's really funny.' And I've always thought that she was kind of like a gold mine for parody because there's all these things that went wrong in her life.
Humor has historically been tied to the mores of the day. The Yellow Kid was predicated on what people thought was funny about the immigrant Irish. When you're different in a society, you're funny.
All you have in comedy, in general, is just going with your instincts. You can only hope that other people think that what you think is funny is funny. I don't have an answer but I just try to plough straight ahead.
I have only been funny about seventy four per cent of the time. Yes I think that is right. Seventy-four per cent of the time.
James Caan told me at the end of filming 'Elf' that he had been waiting through the whole film for me to be funny - and I never was.
I always find it actually funny that the analysis is that the characters I play in comedies are the manchild, the adolescent, characters that refuse to grow up. And yet, if you look back in the history of comedy all the way back to the Marx brothers, that's a big part of comedy.
The funny guy doesn't get the girl until later in life. High school, college, everyone still wants the brooding, dangerous guy you shouldn't have.
I know the nature of comedy, and you never know what will happen with the next movie or whether people will find it funny.
I'm the one who's dating the craft-service guy instead of the producer. Plus, if a producer is going to date a hot young thing, I'm probably not the first person on their list - the weird, quirky, funny girl.
Saying women aren't funny is now like saying Asians can't drive or saying black people have bad credit. It's just really, like, so obsolete.
I had a moment where I was onstage once... As a comedian, you just think, 'Be funny as possible all the time - like, funny at all costs - jokes, jokes, jokes.' That's how my mentality was.
I feel really trapped as a comedian - someone who is supposed to be funny and light, making jokes all the time. But I'm actually in this inauthentic armor.
I love being a dad, it keeps me fit and inspired and children are so funny. They always supply you with acting material!
I guess when I think about it, one of the things I like to dramatise, and what is sometimes funny, is someone coming unglued. I don't consider myself someone who is making the argument that I support these choices. I just think it can be funny.
I don't think I was funny until college. I lived with some Harvard MD/PhD students - they were so smart, and what I contributed to the house was, I was the funny one.
I think there have always been funny women, from Carol Burnett to Joan Rivers. When the audience sees a woman, they innately know she's worked twice as hard to get there, she's had to prove that she can be the leader, first, and then be funny on top of it. She has to emit a confidence that she's in control.
I grew up in a little funny town called Xuzhou, in the countryside, very poor. We didn't have hot water. We were four children: three girls and a boy.
You know what? At the end of the day, funny is funny. I hope to see the end of all the female cliches that are written in a lot of comedies that are named chick flicks.
I've got a bunch of books... I rely on funny books and movies to cheer me up. Oh, but I must say, I do have the world's most perfect husband, so a cuddle from him always cheers me up. He's a good guy.
There is some humour in 'Family Values.' I don't want everyone to think it's not going to make them laugh. But there are quite a lot of poems there that aren't funny at all.
I personally love the record-making more than the actually performing and travelling. It's funny, the drastic shift in lifestyle that comes with it. It certainly satisfies my more adventurous side, but it leaves little time for contemplation and all of that.
Some characters think more like me than others; some think more like my dad or someone else. It certainly is made up of my experiences, things I've heard, things I think are funny, things I think are sad. There's sort of a strange, blurry version of yourself in there.
Keep your sense of humor, my friend; if you don't have a sense of humor it just isn't funny anymore.
'Friends' played in this territory of being funny, and then also just grabbing your heart. And not afraid of that. It was a comedic soap opera. Not being afraid to have an audience feel something, laugh and cry, was quite extraordinary and quite wonderful.
But I think funny and talent will always win out; I mean, of course there are hurdles, but I think if you're funny you will get over all of that.
I'm always thinking of stuff; I just don't sit down and write it. I come up with material more as I go along; if something funny happens, I'll make a note of it on my phone.
It's a funny thing, but today the Titanic is probably much more - that is people are much more aware of it than they were in 1954, when I was doing my research.
I don't happen to have a sense of humor personally, so I don't know what's funny about a character... This happens to be a feature of my life generally.
It's a funny thing about life; if you refuse to accept anything but the best, you very often get it.
There is nothing in the world that I loathe more than group activity, that communal bath where the hairy and slippery mix in a multiplication of mediocrity.
All of the films I'm doing are young, urban, high-concept, funny films. That's the zone where I'd like to play and have fun in.
Alien Chutney is just what the name suggests it is. Its music that is so funny and quirky and weird that it feels entirely alien to the listener; yet, the content and the subject matter is so Indian and relatable, it's still chutney.
What is important to me as an actor is that, even if I have to spread my arms, take my shirt off on a mountain top with my heroine in a chiffon sari, it still has to be me and my twist or my funny take on it.
Unless someone wants to look funny, I'll not recommend anyone to copy my bowling action. But on a serious note, with the confidence that I have got from the amount of runs I have been scoring, when I'm thrown the ball to bowl, I am pretty sure of what I have to do. I may not be the most attractive to watch while bowling, but I can be effective.
I don't know how to troll people, but there are many out there talking with that intent. I just write something funny that would make people laugh.
The funny thing is, people's perceptions of what a song is about is usually wrong a majority of the time. But they're still going to read what they want to into it.
It's grueling never knowing if the audience is going to think you're funny. It's soul-destroying when they don't laugh.
It started off with flu-like symptoms and pain; then, I started feeling really funny. In two weeks, I was paralyzed from the waist down, and it spiraled down from there. Every ability I had was slowly slipping away.
What's David's role? David looks good, that's what David does. David looks good, and I'm the funny one, that's what I hear constantly. But I keep telling him that looks fade.
On family trips and vacations, I remember walking around with my little sister and making funny songs on the spot.
I don't have a caustic sense of humor. What I find funny, that humor comes from a much gentler place.
The funny thing is that I'm the girl who no one sees at the beach. Ask anyone who's traveled with me. Normally, I'm in so many layers, I look like Lawrence of Arabia!
Funny, I think that the only reason I'm compared to Prince is because of my skin color.
There are just so many funny kids and teenagers. They're just not aware of how funny they are.
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Today's Quote
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