Jimmy Carr Quotes

Most Famous Jimmy Carr Quotes of All Time!

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They say the people most affected by the credit crunch are pensioners - well, let go of the handbag then, Nanna.

I was in the South of France. I saw a Brownie on a school trip. She was holding up a book. It said on the front 'rough guide'. I thought: 'Yeah' she's not a looker.

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More people are going out to comedy shows than they were before.

I go around the country and do a simple gag like, 'The property ladder is now a snake' and get a real laugh.

I was in love with the idea of being in love with a woman way before I was actually in love with one.

Women were quite terrifying until I was older. I think that's partly down to confidence.

I was a Christian. I didn't want to have sex before marriage, I was a bit uptight and not very self-confident. I was a virgin until I was 26.

A surprising amount of my jokes sound very implausible but are true.

I don't see myself as offending people.

I am trying to release endorphins here. I am not preaching to you - I am trying to make you laugh.

The bigger the audience, the better with comedy.

It is such a social thing, laughing. Two thousand people in a room laughing is such a great buzz and they tend to laugh much more in a group.

You never want to be the grumpy guy, although I do have quite a grumpy face.

I like to write a joke without any fat on it. The shorter the better. I cater for people with ADD, basically.

The first few weeks of joining Weight Watchers, you're just finding your feet.

Yes, I have this crazy honk of a laugh.

You go, well you can't joke about race. Well if you're from a different race and that's your experience of the world and you want to talk about that, then fine. Or you can't talk about disability, but disabled comics...

There's things that I couldn't joke about but other people could.

It's so clear cut with a comedian - you have that reflex action, whereby you laugh or you don't. And so you either love us or you simply cannot see why people are laughing.

The tragedy for comedians is there's nothing more they want than to be liked. We desperately seek approval. It's almost like a personality disorder you can do as a job.

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