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Funny Quotes

Most Famous Funny Quotes of All Time!

We have created a collection of some of the best funny quotes so you can read and share anytime with your friends and family. Share our Top 10 Funny Quotes on Facebook, Twitter, and Pinterest.

In the '80s, it was difficult and frustrating to appear in the theater and TV again, even though I had some successful shows and hit records. Now, I have to say, the '90s are the best decade of my life....

Quotes by David Cassidy

A vegetarian is a person who won't eat anything that can have children.

Quotes by David Brenner

When I go to a bar, I don't go looking for a girl who knows the capital of Maine.

Quotes by David Brenner

Some nights I'm funny with the between-song commentary, some nights I'm not. I have no control over this. I pace the stage a lot and struggle with the mic stand in a ridiculous way.

Quotes by David Berman

I like cartoons. I like 'Foster's Home for Imaginary Friends.' It's funny! It has things that kids wouldn't get. It's like, if you're mature, you get it. I like that and 'The Fairly OddParents.'

Quotes by David Archuleta

As funny as it sounds, the best thing I got out of making a solo record was to realize how much I love being in a band.

Quotes by Dave Pirner

The fact that Manti Te'o thought for a long time that he was dating, like, a fake girl and then that she died and did the tribute and the girl never existed. I mean inherently that's funny.

Quotes by Dave Portnoy

I think that the episodes are like mini horror films really; the characters make bad decisions early on and these things just snowball for them and get worse and worse. And that's what I find funny.

Quotes by Dave Rowntree

The whole point of real comedy is that you can say something that is true, and by being funny, you can make it tolerable for people, and hopefully they'll laugh at you, too.

Quotes by Dave Rubin

The funny thing is that I had never actually watched TV.

Quotes by Dave Willis

It's funny because as a rapper, there is - and this is something that Clipping challenges all the time - there is this idea about authenticity as a rapper, in the fact that you rap things that are yours. That's...

Quotes by Daveed Diggs

Fake buckteeth make a joke that you don't have to make any effort on, even if you're not a funny person.

Quotes by Dave Itzkoff

It's funny, I get a little quieter with time. I don't want to chase my tail and one day repeat myself and repeat myself and one day have kids going to college and not have memories that I should, because...

Quotes by Dave Matthews

There have been times when I felt suicidal and I would stop my head from going in that direction of negativity because I thought there'd be something I'd miss that was funny in the future. If there's a chance I'm...

Quotes by Dave Navarro

It's funny; recently I've started to notice people's impersonations of me, and it's basically like a hyperactive child.

Quotes by Dave Grohl

I think my funny books are my favorites because I like to laugh so much.

Quotes by Dav Pilkey

I'm not a movie guy, I'm not a TV sitcom guy, but whatever seems to fit and is funny is good for me.

Quotes by Dave Attell

The four building blocks of the universe are fire, water, gravel and vinyl.

Quotes by Dave Barry

It is a scientific fact that your body will not absorb cholesterol if you take it from another person's plate.

Quotes by Dave Barry

I was doing sketches that were funny but socially irresponsible. I felt I was deliberately being encouraged and I was overwhelmed.

Quotes by Dave Chappelle

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