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Funny Quotes

Most Famous Funny Quotes of All Time!

We have created a collection of some of the best funny quotes so you can read and share anytime with your friends and family. Share our Top 10 Funny Quotes on Facebook, Twitter, and Pinterest.

It's good to be funny when you are a comedian.

Quotes by George Lindsey

Whoever is my relative, I will not be nice to them.

Quotes by George Lopez

I don't know if the art of stand-up will survive. Stand-up seems dated. Now you can do a mini-movie or a short with a beginning, middle, and end. A guy standing there seems a little old - especially when you...

Quotes by George Lopez

Hurried and worried until we're buried, and there's no curtain call, Lifes a very funny proposition after all.

Quotes by George M. Cohan

An optimist is a fellow who believes a housefly is looking for a way to get out.

Quotes by George Jean Nathan

I don't think you can teach people how to be funny. You can make suggestions about how to speak a line or get a laugh, but it has to be in them.

Quotes by George Cukor

He was like a cock who thought the sun had risen to hear him crow.

George Eliot

Electricity is really just organized lightning.

Quotes by George Carlin

Weather forecast for tonight: dark.

Quotes by George Carlin

May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house.

Quotes by George Carlin

Frisbeetarianism is the belief that when you die, your soul goes up on the roof and gets stuck.

Quotes by George Carlin

In comic strips, the person on the left always speaks first.

Quotes by George Carlin

If you live to be one hundred, you've got it made. Very few people die past that age.

Quotes by George Burns

For a Catholic kid in parochial school, the only way to survive the beatings - by classmates, not the nuns - was to be the funny guy.

Quotes by George A. Romero

Bill Murray is a wonderful actor, and he's very funny, and I've seen him be serious and terrific.

Quotes by Geoffrey Ward

I don't mean to sound - I don't want it to come out funny, but I don't like show business. I love - I love acting in films. I love it.

Quotes by Gene Wilder

I write funny. If I can make my wife laugh, I know I'm on the right track. But yes, I don't like to get Maudlin. And I have a tendency towards it.

Quotes by Gene Wilder

Losing streaks are funny. If you lose at the beginning you got off to a bad start. If you lose in the middle of the season, you're in a slump. If you lose at the end, you're choking.

Quotes by Gene Mauch

Let's say I'm not feeling well, and somebody would say to me, 'Just do an easy show, just go out and do a light...' - I can't! I cannot do that kind of a show. I have to still put...

Quotes by Gene Pitney

Lots of models have played mermaids throughout history and it is, kind of, a funny rite of passage.

Quotes by Gemma Ward

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