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Funny Quotes

Most Famous Funny Quotes of All Time!

We have created a collection of some of the best funny quotes so you can read and share anytime with your friends and family. Share our Top 10 Funny Quotes on Facebook, Twitter, and Pinterest.

I just find all that stuff incredibly funny. I love a fart. I'd do anything for a good poo story.

Quotes by Phoebe Waller-Bridge

Housework can't kill you, but why take a chance?

Quotes by Phyllis Diller

I want my children to have all the things I couldn't afford. Then I want to move in with them.

Quotes by Phyllis Diller

Best way to get rid of kitchen odors: Eat out.

Quotes by Phyllis Diller

The only time I ever enjoyed ironing was the day I accidentally got gin in the steam iron.

Quotes by Phyllis Diller

People just don't laugh when their family is violated, and you don't shrug it off. You band together and you defend together. It's a funny, primitive instinct.

Quotes by Phillip Noyce

I took dance from a very early age, although my first recital, I remember refusing to go onstage. I think I was three. It's funny because that stage was also my high school theater stage.

Quotes by Phillipa Soo

We moved to Baltimore, Maryland, in 1979, when I was five. The funny thing is that, even though Baltimore had one of the top murder rates in the country in those days, I grew up hearing about how dangerous New...

Quotes by Philipp Meyer

Yes, I see the Mobile Base System really is the shoulder of the arm. The arm is right there, like a human arm. It's really funny to look at the similarities between a human arm and the Canadian robotics arm.

Quotes by Philippe Perrin

Life's pretty funny when you're objectively on the outside looking at it.

Quotes by Philip Seymour Hoffman

It's funny, because it's always been a dream of mine to play in the NFL, but I was concerned about the games being played on Sundays. I love to play football but wanted to be able to attend Mass as...

Quotes by Philip Rivers

You know what, December's a funny time of the year, because the weather changes, the central heating comes on; sometimes you can get colds and coughs and flu.

Quotes by Phil Taylor

I think there's a notion in our society, and it may be valid, that people aren't as funny when they get older. It's a stigma still attached to the rebelliousness of youth.

Quotes by Phil Hartman

There have been funny sequels, but I don't know if there have been that many that feel like they're - you know - they're just as great a movie to watch, just as fun an experience but different.

Quotes by Phil Lord

My first band was called Nubert Circus, a very embarrassing, dumb name. It means nothing. We were kind of grunge. I would say we were more funny punk, a lot of songs about food and stuff like that.

Quotes by Phil Elverum

In my old age, it's kind of funny - at night, what I like to do is watch TV when I go to sleep. And what I really like is to put on a Gene Autry film, because he sings...

Quotes by Phil Everly

I have an all-Japanese design team, and none of them speak English. So it's often funny and surprising how my ideas end up lost in translation.

Quotes by Pharrell Williams

I was so afraid to even read a paper in front of my classmates. It is very funny because at that point my teachers would never have believed that I could speak in front of an audience of over 2,000...

Quotes by Petra Nemcova

I make funny videos of me playing video games, and I share those moments.

Quotes by PewDiePie

I like the clowns from the circus that have more paint on their face. They were all funny and made me laugh. As a kid, I remember the clowns that were all in white reminded me more of death than...

Quotes by Peter Stormare

Frequently Asked Questions

What's a heartwarming quote about parenting and humor?
One quote captures the joy of fatherhood, saying "I love being a dad, it keeps me fit and inspired and children are so funny," adding that kids "always supply you with acting material!" For more lighthearted lines, see our Captions page.
Is there a quote about creating funny characters?
Yes - one quote shares a simple creative goal: "All I want to do is write songs about funny characters I made up." Browse more in our Jokes collection.
Does the collection touch on dramatizing funny moments?
One quote reflects on a creative habit, mentioning enjoying dramatizing "someone coming unglued" as something that can be "sometimes funny." For more playful riddles, see our Riddles page.
Is there a quote celebrating funny women in comedy?
Yes - one quote honors the legacy of women in comedy, noting there "have always been funny women, from Carol Burnett to Joan Rivers," and how audiences recognize the extra effort it's taken for women to succeed in the field.
What's the tone across this funny quotes collection?
It ranges from family warmth to creative ambition to a tribute to comedic trailblazers. Explore more in our Shayari collection.

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