Adam Carolla Quotes

Most Famous Adam Carolla Quotes of All Time!

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I've always boxed, I always taught boxing.

You don't cruise the Internet looking for your name and walk away with a good feeling. So, I never do it.

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When you're doing a radio show, you can express yourself.

I think comedy has evolved like every art form, and people probably do less standing around and telling jokes, and more things that have to do with reality.

I'd never hurt another person.

I swear my car won't run unless I'm picking my nose: At least, I'm that superstitious about it, so I don't want to take any chances.

Well, guys are better at mechanical stuff and women are better at emotional stuff.

If women built the bridges or were meant to build the bridges, then they would have done it.

I don't burn any calories trying to be masculine; I just happen to be from that world.

I'm not sexist, I'm just a realist.

I don't know anything about computers.

I'm a sort of nuts-and-bolts guy. I'm into turning wrenches and swinging a hammer and wrenching on cars.

I'm a doofus from the Valley, a blue-collar guy.

People are stupid. There's a lot of dumb stuff that's successful.

I'm like John Q. Public. I represent what every guy wants and needs.

Millions of guys play millions of basketball games every day of the week at the playground or the YMCA. But LeBron James gets $20 million a year because he can jam on all of those guys. We're always going to...

If in 1989 I said, 'I have an idea: Bottle water and sell it. And charge more than a beer,' they would have chased me around with a giant butterfly net. The same with paying to watch a television station.

I'm a comedian, not a politician.

If Joy Behar or Sherri Shepherd was a dude, they'd be off TV. They're not funny enough for dudes. What if Roseanne Barr was a dude? Think we'd know who she was?

When you're picking a basketball team, you'll take the brother over the guy with the yarmulke. Why? Because you're playing the odds.

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