Bill Engvall Quotes

Most Famous Bill Engvall Quotes of All Time!

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I dream of acting with Kevin Costner. I would love to do a movie with him. Not something funny, but a dramatic role.

I've really got no complaints.

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To be honest with you, I still eat whatever I want. It's all about portion control. I still love pizza, but instead of eating half, I eat a slice.

I eat fish, chicken, vegetables and other healthier foods. I do love a great steak.

Now people live into their 90s and beyond. As long as I have quality of life, I'm good.

I love to laugh, and laughter is one of my favorite things. When you have a really good laugh, you feel great afterwards.

My belief is that if we take away that right to bear arms, the only people that are going to have them are... the ones breaking into your house.

I don't believe there's any reason for a person like myself to own an AK-47.

I think you can ban guns if you can just pull the trigger and 60 bullets fire out.

There's a lot of things I believe in this world. I believe in God, I believe in the United States of America, and I support and believe in the Second Amendment.

I used to hunt and fish.

I like to hang on to cars. I'm not one of these guys that goes flipping cars all the time. If I find a car I like, I stick with it.

My favorite road trip ever is when my wife and I took an RV around the country. We just had the best time.

America loves to watch people growing and getting better.

If you lived next door to me and didn't know what I did, you wouldn't know I was a celebrity. I don't have that lifestyle, nor do I want that lifestyle. I want to know that I can have a...

I've never said I was the best dancer, and I never said I was a good dancer.

I'm from Texas. You would think my biggest draw would be in that state. But my biggest draw is Pennsylvania.

I have fun on stage, so people think maybe they should, too.

What I do is not regional comedy, and it is not based in the southern area.

Standup is a form of therapy. It is OK to tell problems to your audience as long as you are being honest and not boring them. I tell them that I am saving $75 an hour when I talk to...

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