Arthur Smith Quotes

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Sometimes it's good to do something that you've never done before, so yesterday, I went out to buy Elton John's new album.

Sometimes it's bad to do something you've never done before.

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Travel books are, by and large, boring. They lodge uncomfortably between fact, fiction and autobiography.

Occasionally I find a travel book that is both illuminating and entertaining, where vivid writing and research replace self-indulgence and sloppy prose.

Don Quixote's 'Delusions' is an excellent read - far better than my own forthcoming travel book, 'Walking Backwards Across Tuscany.'

Give me the new thing and give it to me now. I don't want that old thing - I've seen it, heard it, bought it, slept with it, loved it, but now I'm bored with the old thing and I'm...

When synchronised swimming first appeared on TV, we laughed very heartily, and I, for one, applauded the decision to introduce humour into the Olympics.

The history of the relationship between comedy and swimming is short indeed. Of course it is always funny when someone falls into water, but that's about it.

Acting is the most demanding, painful job in the world.

Acting in a stage play is like working the evening shift in an office.

I've noticed that my resolutions involve me not doing stuff that I wasn't going to do anyway so here's something more positive. I'm going to retrain as a Latin teacher in a provincial public school.

When a writer dies you get a higher standard of obituary.

Global warming, the ongoing destruction of the planet, Third World debt, the uselessness of the railways, the takeover by the corporations, the scary George Bush person: all these things are important and should be animating me into outrage. Yet somehow...

I'm an armchair kind of guy, especially when it's raining, which it always is and always will be.

Someone once described me as the Zelig of comedy, and I think I know what he means.

I've always been interested in art.

I have a suspicion that a lot of artists are trying to get a laugh but, unlike stand-ups, they don't get an immediate response from their audience; a laugh is a rare thing in a gallery.

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