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Top 10 Steven Wright Quotes

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10

If you are in a spaceship that is traveling at the speed of light, and you turn on the headlights, does anything happen?

9

A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.

8

I look like a casual, laid-back guy, but it's like a circus in my head.

7

I went to a general store but they wouldn't let me buy anything specific.

6

George Carlin's album, 'Class Clown,' came out when I was in high school. I memorized a lot of that album. I'd come home from school, put it on, and listen over and over. I started memorizing it. I don't even know why. I loved it so much I memorized it.

5

If you tell a joke in the forest, but nobody laughs, was it a joke?

4

Whenever I think of the past, it brings back so many memories.

3

On the other hand, you have different fingers.

2

I was reading the dictionary. I thought it was a poem about everything.

1

I like to reminisce with people I don't know.

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Today's Quote

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Wake up each day and be thankful for life. Good morning!

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