Top 10 Louis C K Quotes

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If you're a woman and a guy's ever said anything romantic to you, he just left off the second part that would have made you sick if you could have heard it.

Life isn't something you possess. It's something you take part in, and you witness.

I've had soccer moms come up and tell me they can relate when I say that I want to throw my baby in the trash.

When I am in a hotel, and I turn off the lights and the TV, I just freak out. I turn the TV back on and don't get any sleep.

I've tried to do away with lying in my life in the last few years, but it's hard.

Well, when I was younger, I lied all the time, because once you understand the power of lying, it's really like magic because you transform reality for people.

I wish I could know everything ever, like that would be my wish - that's what I hope heaven is, that they tell you who shot JFK and all that stuff.

I was an awkward kid.

Cars and cameras are the two things I let myself be materialistic about. I don't care about other stuff.

I thought about going to NYU film school - that was this ideal to me. But I didn't make any kind of grades in high school.

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