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Men Quotes

Serious duty and dry humor, side by side.

Quotes about "men" here range from serious to sharply funny — one set addresses military service and daily accountability, while another pushes back on the idea that women should shape themselves around what men expect. For related themes, see Great quotes.

Women who love women are Lesbians. Men, because they can only think of women in sexual terms, define Lesbian as sex between women.

Quotes by Rita Mae Brown

Men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage - they've experienced pain and bought jewelry.

Quotes by Rita Rudner

Men reach their sexual peak at eighteen. Women reach theirs at thirty-five. Do you get the feeling that God is playing a practical joke?

Quotes by Rita Rudner

To attract men, I wear a perfume called 'New Car Interior.'

Quotes by Rita Rudner

I think men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage. They've experienced pain and bought jewelry.

Quotes by Rita Rudner

Men who consistently leave the toilet seat up secretly want women to get up to go the bathroom in the middle of the night and fall in.

Quotes by Rita Rudner

Some people think having large breasts makes a woman stupid. Actually, it's quite the opposite: a woman having large breasts makes men stupid.

Quotes by Rita Rudner

Men are self-confident because they grow up identifying with super-heroes. Women have bad self-images because they grow up identifying with Barbie.

Quotes by Rita Rudner

Other people get moody in their forties and fifties - men get the male menopause. I missed the whole thing. I was just really happy.

Quotes by Rik Mayall

Call it Camelot's revenge: the class of court scribes who made it their profession to uphold a make-believe version of America free of conflict and ruled by noble men helped Nixon get away with it for so long - because,...

Quotes by Rick Perlstein

In the suburban Midwestern Reform Jewish world I was raised in, in the nineteen-seventies and eighties, grown men built plastic scale models of Israeli tanks and F-15 jets and displayed them throughout the house, dangling the warplanes from bedroom ceilings...

Quotes by Rick Perlstein

Obamacare has got everyone on edge. I mean, small business - men and women or big business are sitting out there saying we have no idea what this is going to cost, but we know it's going to cost us...

Quotes by Rick Perry

I hate this fast growing tendency to chain men to machines in big factories and deprive them of all joy in their efforts - the plan will lead to cheap men and cheap products.

Quotes by Richard Wagner

All men wish to have truth on their side; but few to be on the side of truth.

Quotes by Richard Whately

Men are like sheep, of which a flock is more easily driven than a single one.

Quotes by Richard Whately

It is folly to expect men to do all that they may reasonably be expected to do.

Quotes by Richard Whately

It is generally true that all that is required to make men unmindful of what they owe God for any blessing is that they should receive that blessing often and regularly.

Quotes by Richard Whately

To this congress the poet speaks not of peculiar and personal things, but of what in himself is most common, most anonymous, most fundamental, most true of all men.

Quotes by Richard Wilbur

Men can starve from a lack of self-realization as much as they can from a lack of bread.

Richard Wright

Men simply copied the realities of their hearts when they built prisons.

Richard Wright

Frequently Asked Questions

What kind of quotes about "Men" will I find on this page?
A mix of tones - a serious quote about military service and accountability, a thoughtful line about encouraging women to be themselves rather than conform to men's expectations, and a couple of lighter, humorous quotes about men and buses, and a cheeky Christmas quip.
Is there a serious quote about military service here?
Yes, one quote describes men and women fighting in Iraq as "held accountable for their performance and their conduct," serving on duty and off, twenty-four hours a day, in defense of the country's safety and rights. For more on themes of duty and character, see the Great page.
Is there a funny or lighthearted quote about men in this collection?
Definitely. One quote jokes: "Bloody men are like bloody buses - you wait for about a year and as soon as one approaches your stop two or three others appear." Another wishes "goodwill to men" at Christmas, with the punchline being they should also help with the washing up.
Is there a quote about gender expectations?
Yes, one quote talks about encouraging women to be themselves "rather than what men want them to be," and rejects patronizing either sex. Browse the Life page for more reflections on identity and relationships.
Why does this page mix serious and humorous quotes?
Because that's simply the range of quotes people have written using the word "men" - from weighty statements about accountability and service to playful jabs about dating and holiday chores. For more of both tones, check out the Good and Like pages.

The lighter entries take a comic, exasperated tone about men in everyday life, including holiday chores and the long wait for a good one to come along. Continue with Good quotes or Like quotes for more comparisons.