Top 10 Ali Wong Quotes

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It's unfair to the hard-core stay-at-home moms to pretend you're able to have an amazing body by chasing around your kids.

I think one of the hardest things to talk about as a comic is having money because it's so unrelatable.

I'm always asked how my husband is feeling about my success with a note of concern. He feels great. It's not hard to feel good about your spouse making money.

Before my dad passed away, I would miss a lot of baby showers and weddings, sacrificed a lot of family and friend events for dumb road dates. I don't do that anymore. It's gone in the other direction. I'm more inclined to put family and friends first.

Women, a lot of the time, are so much funnier than men, but they just choose not to do comedy for a living.

Comedy has so much to do with honesty, and women can be more open about their emotions.

The life of a true, traditional stand-up is really unappealing for women.

My dad was a doctor, and he would tell us a lot of nasty, funny stories from the hospital. It was funny to me when I'd go over to other people's houses and they didn't talk about intestines at the table.

I'm addicted to picking my nose. In a world of red tape and bureaucracy, where it takes forever to buy a house or get a cell-phone plan going, it's so instant to just stick your finger up there and go for something your own body produces.

People are always very surprised by how, offstage with my husband, I'm a completely different person... very soft and nurturing.

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