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Jack Benny Quotes

Most Famous Jack Benny Quotes of All Time!

We have created a collection of some of the best jack-benny quotes so you can read and share anytime with your friends and family.

I don't deserve this award, but I have arthritis and I don't deserve that either.

I don't want to tell you how much insurance I carry with the Prudential, but all I can say is: when I go, they go too.

My wife Mary and I have been married for forty-seven years and not once have we had an argument serious enough to consider divorce; murder, yes, but divorce, never.

Give me golf clubs, fresh air and a beautiful partner, and you can keep the clubs and the fresh air.

Hors D'oeuvre: A ham sandwich cut into forty pieces.

Modesty is my best quality.

If you don't mind, it doesn't matter.

Gags die, humor doesn't.

It's not so much knowing when to speak, when to pause.

Age is strictly a case of mind over matter. If you don't mind, it doesn't matter.

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Today's Quote

Democrats have a long history of utilizing the threat of a potential Ebola outbreak to request massive federal funds while...

Quote Of The Day

Today's Shayari

चूम कर कफ़न में लिपटें मेरे चेहरे को, उसने
तड़प के कहा नए कपड़े क्या पहन लिए, हमें देखते भी...

Shayari Of The Day

Today's Joke

एक औरत की महिला मित्र: अरे देख ना.. वो लड़की कब से तेरे पति को घूर रही है।

औरत बोली:-...

Joke Of The Day

Today's Status

Price is what you pay. Value is what you get.

Status Of The Day

Today's Prayer

You’re everything I have got in this world dear Lord, give me understanding so that I may fully see you...

Prayer Of The Day