Carlos Mencia Quotes

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Well, the hard part about doing auditions is that the person reading you the lines, they're not really into it. They're just going, 'Oh really, so why do you think that?' And they're just looking at a piece of paper.

I get really nervous at auditions. I know how to make people laugh, but auditions just really make me nervous.

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When I tell a joke, I immediately know whether it's funny or not.

The beauty of not growing up middle class is that you don't think like the middle class. You don't have anything to protect, you know what I mean?

I grew up being very patriotic. My parents really love this country. A big part of what they love is freedom of speech... I'm fearless because aren't we supposed to be able to speak our mind?

Nobody calls me a racist when I do redneck jokes. Jeff Foxworthy can do as many 'You might be a redneck jokes' as he wants, but I'm telling you as soon as a guy like that does a black joke...

I'm like most people in America. I'm conservative on some things, and I'm liberal on other things.

If I've got a black joke, and I can't tell it in Oakland, then I shouldn't tell the joke anywhere else.

Here's the problem: People have completely and utterly forgotten one thing when it comes to communication - intent.

Is it my fault that there is a stereotype that black people are not good swimmers? I know that's a joke, but somebody will say, 'I can't believe you would say that.' Well, first of all it's just a joke,...

I had one guy say, 'I watched your show and didn't agree with what you said.' And I'm like, 'It's a joke. How could you not agree? I can understand you saying it's not funny.' But it's like my going...

I was only 20, 21. I was basically going to college to get me out of the ghetto. A friend suggested I try stand-up.

Before I got into stand-up, I was a really quiet guy who had all these thoughts, all these things I wanted to say, but there was never anyplace for me to say them because my mom would look at me...

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