Billy Connolly Quotes

Most Famous Billy Connolly Quotes of All Time!

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Marriage is a wonderful invention: then again, so is a bicycle repair kit.

Ally MacLeod thinks that tactics are a new kind of mint.

The great thing about Glasgow is that if there's a nuclear attack it'll look exactly the same afterwards.

I don't believe in angels and I have trouble with the whole God thing. I don't want to say I don't believe in God, but I don't think I do. But I believe in people who do.

I don't have wild dogs chasing people with scripts away from my door. I get my share. I've done okay. But I usually do independent stuff because that's mostly what I'm offered.

I love Los Angeles. It reinvents itself every two days.

I loved Japan. I used to read a lot about it when I was a child. And I always wanted to go. And it was delightful. I absolutely loved it. What a smashing place.

I'm a citizen of the world. I like it that way. The world's a wonderful. I just think that some people are pretty badly represented. But when you speak to the people themselves they're delightful. They all want so little.

It seems to me that Islam and Christianity and Judaism all have the same god, and he's telling them all different things.

The only time I would like to see was the 20s and 30s in America because I love the music and the style and the optimism, I wanted to see New York being built. I wanted to see all that, you know.

There are two seasons in Scotland: June and Winter.

If Jesus was a Jew, how come he has a Mexican first name?

My parents used to take me to the pet department and tell me it was a zoo.

Never trust a man, who when left alone with a tea cosey... Doesn't try it on.

Fame is being asked to sign your autograph on the back of a cigarette packet.

I don't know why I should have to learn Algebra... I'm never likely to go there.

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