Andrew Shaffer Quotes

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Christmas sits like a black hole on the calendar. Just try scheduling a meeting at work the month of December.

Celebrating Christmas without subscribing to Christianity is like watching the Super Bowl without watching a regular season game. Some people watch the Super Bowl for the commercials; others watch it for the halftime show.

Once an ebook hits the Kindle Top 100, sales tend to snowball as new customers discover it in greater numbers.

With traditional publishing, books might be pulled due to plagiarism or libel - but rarely for content, and especially not without a widespread outcry.

While I've never asked my publisher to pull one of my books off the shelves, I have deleted tweets or blog posts that have drawn criticism.

It's not always caving to pressure: Sometimes criticism hits close to home; sometimes criticism changes our minds about something we've put out into the world.

This is a common misconception about antidepressants: many people believe they're simply 'happy pills' that will wipe a person's emotional slate clean. Used correctly, antidepressants can lift the fog of mental illness.

Instead of silencing artists, is it possible that antidepressants can actually help them vocalize their creative ambitions?

As a writer who has struggled with depression, the question is one that has long troubled me. Should I resist treatment, on the off-chance my creative output will somehow be affected?

Way before musicians and actors cornered the market on misbehavior, writers were flooding hotel rooms and testing their livers' upper limits.

Barnes & Noble, along with other independent bookstores, are refusing to stock Amazon Publishing titles. They'll order books from the online retail giant if customers ask, but bookstores have so far declined to be 'showrooms' for Amazon.

Buying reviews of ebooks that include downloads is a well-known way to 'juice' an ebook's sales rank and attract new readers.

The higher a book's sales ranks, the better chances it has of being noticed by Amazon's internal recommendations engine.

Visibility is one of the most difficult parts of the self-publishing equation. No matter how great your book is, it is fighting against a tidal wave of cheap ebooks on Amazon.

If you can pay enough people to buy your .99 ebook and review it positively, and crack one of Amazon's bestseller lists, readers are going to check it out. Especially at a low price point like .99. Customers are suckers for the fallacy that the cream rises to the top.

I catch Filter in Des Moines doing their soundcheck at a small club. After tearing through a few songs, they spend nearly an hour meeting with fans as part of a radio station meet-and-greet.

When Patrick finally broke his silence with 2008's 'Anthems For the Damned' - the first Filter album that he recorded sober - fans were decidedly lukewarm.

'Anthems' was a harsh indictment of American foreign policy; the video for the first single featured an American flag engulfed in a pool of oil, imagery which might have been risque in 2002, but seemed unimaginably passe in the last year of Bush's presidency.

Many non-believers who have entered substance abuse programs have found themselves at odds with the religious overtones prevalent in the recovery industry.

Every published writer, myself included, was at one time unpublished. All writers know what rejection feels like.

It's easy to feel spurned, especially when you return to your apartment and stare at the hundreds of rejection letters tacked to your bulletin board.

After finishing my undergraduate work at the University of Iowa, where I took creative writing classes taught by Writer's Workshop students, I applied to half a dozen MFA writing programs.

Cremer's 'Nightshade' is a smart blend of romance, action, philosophy, and pagan witchcraft. And, yes, high-schoolers shape-shifting into wolves.

'First Step 2 Forever' is a hardcover, multi-colored monstrosity that clocks in at 240 pages... half of which feature full-page pictures of the 16-year-old Bieber.

If you're looking for a behind-the-scenes rock-n-roll biography, pick up Nikki Sixx's 'The Heroin Diaries'. If you want the world's most narcissistic high school yearbook, however, 'First Step 2 Forever' is your new bicycle.

Young adult author Richelle Mead holds the distinction to perhaps be the only author ever to have a book banned... before it was even written.

In 2009, the American Library Association recorded 460 challenges reported to the Office of Intellectual Freedom.

Richelle Mead's 'Vampire Academy' saga is set to be the next young adult paranormal series to become a household name.

I was under the impression that if you've read one vampire series for young adults, you've read them all.

The hottest new attraction at Disney World has got to be the new Last Airbender ride.

Universal Orlando may have the new Harry Potter Wizarding World, but Disney World has the Hari Puttar Experience, based on the Bollywood movie, 'Hari Puttar: A Comedy of Terrors.'

The difficult part of writing about someone you don't admire is that it's easy to demonize them. What you get then is a cackling villain, twirling their mustache at every dastardly deed they commit.

It was a struggle to humanize Donald Trump, who was the antagonist in my satirical thriller 'The Day of the Donald'. Of course, I heard from some readers who thought I made Trump too likable.

In 'Hope Never Dies', Biden attempts to disguise himself with a beach look, hoping that the incongruity of it will allow him to snoop around Wilmington without being recognized. Obama, on the other hand, knows the best way to keep a low profile is to just be himself.

In the White House, Obama was driven around in an armored Cadillac limo nicknamed 'The Beast.' In 'Hope Never Dies,' he blows his book deal advance on 'The Little Beast,' a black Cadillac Escalade upgraded with military-grade armor and shocks so good 'you can drive over a land mine and not spill your tea.'

In their political careers, Obama and Biden faced down lobbyists, Tea Party carpetbaggers, and Washington gridlock.

In 'Hope Never Dies', the fictional Obama and Biden go up against drug traffickers, outlaw bikers, and other seedy opponents. They're forced to use skills they didn't know they had. Or, to put it another way, unlike Jordan Peele's Obama, this Obama doesn't need an anger translator.

If you're reading a mystery novel, you kind of want the character to solve the crime instead of completely bumble their way through it.

Chicago is a city built on architecture, and there are plenty of buildings to scale.

You don't want to write the same story again, but people are like 'We want the same story but different.' Well, how do you do that?

No matter what you do, you're going to run into haters online. We're not talking about ordinary, disgruntled customers who should be addressed with empathy and understanding. Haters are a breed apart.

Don't respond to haters' taunts - even politely. Ignore them. If nobody takes their bait, most will grow bored and move on.

Everybody has a breaking point. It's tough to ignore the impulse to respond with anger.

Treat haters in your online spaces just the same as you would in the real world. If they're not respectful to you and your customers, kick them out.

Biden is actually a wonk at heart. Despite his gaffes, he's very cerebral.

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